Lessons for leadership.

 

Recent findings from a study undertaken by the ICF (International Coach Federation), found that of the main areas addressed in coaching engagements, self-esteem is addressed by at least 28% of clients.  Whilst we do not know what percentage of these were dealing with over-inflated self-esteem, we do know that low self-esteem is a common problem faced by today's leaders.  And, of all the challenges face by leaders and executives, low self-esteem is the one that people just can't seem to bring them selves to talk about. 

So why is low self-esteem the leadership taboo?  And can a leader with low self-esteem ever really be a "great" leader?

Traditional ideas of the characteristics that make for great leaders are at the root of the problem.  "Confident", "out-spoken", "opinionated", "extroverted" - all of these words can be found in descriptions of some of those leaders universally regarded as 'great'.  Throw low self-esteem into the mix and suddenly our picture of leadership is tainted and so too is our confidence in that leader.  In short, we see low self-esteem as a sign of weakness and weakness is not a characteristic we want in our leaders.  It is these unhelpful, negative perceptions that we all associate with low self-esteem that leads it to be such a taboo subject. 

Over the last 50 years, the collective notion of what makes a great leader has changed - some of those characteristics we mentioned above have declined in their relevance and leaders are no longer expected to have all the answers; to be infallible.  Where before a leader gave a direction and it was followed without question, today's leaders actively seek advice and ideas from their teams, they welcome challenges, hold their hands up when they don't know the answer and accept that sometimes taking risks will lead to failure, rather than success.  Despite this shift towards a more 'human' style of leadership, it seems to be a step too far for us to accept that our leaders might experience low self-esteem. 

By definition, self-esteem is an evaluation of your own worthiness and value.  It is influenced by an unquantifiable number of external influences and previous experiences and is therefore subject to constant change.
  

These influences include personal beliefs and morals, upbringing, relationships and significant life events.  In the workplace, self-esteem is largely influenced by factors specific to the individual's previous work experiences, or lack of experience.  The nature of leadership requires our leaders to constantly guide and steer us through difficult times; through change and through uncertainty.  In the majority of situations (and by definition), these situations are new and challenging and therefore the leader has to look deeper to find the relevant experience and knowledge from which to call on.  Additionally, change, by it's very nature leads to doubt and uncertainty - the common reaction in all of us, not just in those required to lead us through. 

Because of the nature of leadership, the pressures our leaders are under and the constantly changing nature of business, it is inevitable that leaders will be subject to moments of doubt; to crises of confidence.  Not only are these feelings perfectly normal, but they show us that our leader cares; that they want to make the 'right' decision, to lead their team to success.  Leaders who suffer with low self-esteem are therefore just as capable of being great, exceptional leaders as those who do not, however, like any performance gap, it must be addressed in order to develop and improve.

I think we are still a long way from a cultural acceptance of low self-esteem in our leaders, despite it being both understandable and almost inevitable.  It is also a fact that a large percentage of our leaders are tackling it, so how do we move forward?    Firstly, leaders need to understand that it is a common issue, they are far from alone.  Secondly, they need to find a way in which they can address it, and coaching, may well prove to be the solution.  Coaching provides a uniquely confidential environment, in which leaders are able to openly and freely express their concerns and fears.  The role of the coach then is to help the leader to see through the smoke; to see more clearly the problem and identify all of the possible solutions.  In so doing, the leader is not only able to think more logically, but their self-esteem is greatly heightened.